Miami has come & gone. I very much wish it was still kicking around- what a trip! The night before I was leaving I was rocking Lincoln to sleep and I just started crying and couldn’t stop. Zack came in the room and was so confused (i’m usually quite stoic). But some maternal feeling had come over me and I didn’t want to go anymore. Obviously I was still getting on that plane but I had an overwhelming feeling of love for this crazy little man. Well, I can tell you, ALWAYS get on that plane. This trip taught Zack and I so much and it proved to be a huge game changer for us as parents.
Zack & Lincoln pretty much couldn’t have had a better time together. I know that they loved each other before but you could tell they didn’t have that same instinctual bond that Linc & I had. Zack had Lincoln sleeping almost through the night, with only 1 feed, and in his crib half the time. Linc didn’t throw many fits, they were super busy and he even took him swimming on his own (*word from Zack: this is not recommended. Canada Games Center doesn’t have the best set up for getting the baby changed & ready. If going alone I’d probably wait until a baby can stand up on their own*) He took him to the crossfit gym (something I haven’t attempted yet) and he even had a couple hours away at a party while Lincoln’s grandpa watched him. It was awesome to see him get right out there and not decrease the activities he wanted to do just because Lincoln was with him.
Zack said that what worked for him was just doing it; he admitted using me as a crutch and if I was around he would just let me take the reigns, this way he just had to do it and do it his way. It couldn’t have been better and you can immediately tell the difference in how they interact. Zack learned Lincoln’s little cues and also got an incredibly special bonding time.
The only learning is now we have our own separate ways to parent and we have Lincoln on different schedules, so we need to come to an understanding and figure out what will work for us.
What was great for me- was time to recharge and remind myself that I can still look half decent.
I had 5 days with girlfriends, we had day drinks by the pool, I did my make up, wore heels, planned outfits, napped whenever I wanted and talked about all the inappropriate things you do on bachelorette parties. We are also all around 30 so it was a different bachelorette than you would think may have happened 5 years ago. We attempted to go to the club super late each night, but would get tired and usually wind up in bed by 1am. One night half of us got home before the car that had the bride to be in it, our group was exhausted and really just wanted to go to sleep. But knowing this weekend wasn’t about us, we decided to wait for the bride to get home to make her decision on what we were going to do next, and in the meantime we would crawl into bed with our clothes on so that if she wanted to go out we were 100% ready. Let’s just say she came into the room and was very happy we were all on the same page and I think we all ended up sleeping in our clothes that night.
I know you’re all waiting for the parenting embarrassing things, so here they are:
1- my connection flight was delayed 2 1/2 hours, but delayed on the tarmac with us on the plane. my boobs were really starting to hurt and I knew I had to pump soon. We were told that we couldn’t get out of our seats at all because on the tarmac we would move like a meter every 3 minutes so it was deemed unsafe. I let one flight attendant know I had to pump and that I would need 15 minutes in the bathroom and she just waved me off and said it wasn’t going to happen. I was embarrassed and just sat there debating my next move. Well then I decided that answer was ludicrous, and I called over another agent and asked if I couldn’t use the bathroom then if she could please bring me a blanket so I could pump in my seat (thankfully I had a pretty new mom beside me who was totally understanding). The flight attendant told me that I could purchase a blanket but she couldn’t give me one- well we all know that answer wasn’t going to fly with me. So I made a scene and told her how ridiculous that was and then I was allowed to use the bathroom. So it all worked out in the end, I couldn’t have imagined pumping in the seat.
2- one day we went on a booze cruise, it was awesome and the beers were flowing (it was bud light so that was pretty easy). I was wearing boob pads because my nipples were still leaking a bit and even though i was in my bathing suit and we were going to be on floaties in the water I didn’t want to leak while we were just on the boat and then smell like sour milk. Well once the beers had taken a little more of a toll I forgot about the pads and obviously started getting in and out of the water, falling off the floaties and generally having a hilarious time. Well one of the pads came half way out of my top and one of the captains friends pointed it out and in his broken spanish asked what that was while he was pointing at my top. Luckily I was feeling zero shame and continued to tell him far too much about what happens to your boobs after birth. #classicchels
3- breast pumps can be quite entertaining to see live. It’s not a pretty scene, but I also didn’t want to hide in a room while my girlfriends were all day drinking so I’d pump wherever. this led to two of them trying the pump/suction on their calf muscles to see if they would create a hicky. It was also quite hilarious to be drinking & pumping at the same time. also pumping & dumping feels like death. it’s liquid gold just going down the drain, I could’ve pulled major pranks and put it in a coffee dish in the fridge, but I’m a nicer friend than that.
It was the best time ever, and I would encourage every mom to go away within the first 6 months and let their partner take charge. It’s just habit that whomever is home during the day with their newborn will take the lead in parenting- so switch it up and enjoy that time off!