I have always been a believer that we would have one baby (naturally). I was open to possibly adopting or becoming a foster parent once our child was older. But all of a sudden I’ve had these days where I text my husband and say “Yeah this child thing is cool, let’s have another.” Or days when Lincoln is being so unbelievably cute that I feel overwhelmed with oozy love and want another one so badly, it almost makes me cry. But the next day I’ll look at Lincoln and our sweet little family of 1 baby and feel complete – often shudder when I think of the first 4 months, and think there is absolutely no way I want to do any of that again.
I really really disliked the first four months. Pregnancy changed my body in ways I wasn’t ready for, birth was absolute hell, and breastfeeding made me want to vomit. Should I really think about doing all of that again? YES. then NO. Then MAYBE?
How do you decide? Did you moms & dads always want multiples, even after not loving pregnancy or the first couple months? Is there an age when it really hits you? Would you wait until they’re out of daycare so its not your entire monthly income being spent in one shot? Knowing we didn’t have the easiest time getting pregnant (revert back to this post), I’m nervous about going through that trauma again. But then I write that and I think- but Lincoln would be the BEST big brother.
Mamas – send me some advice! How did you know? Were you thinking as logically about it as me? Or did you just say, let’s do it- I’m ready? Or did your partner bring it up? HELP.
With Love,
Chelsea
Zero logic over here. We were always going to have two and then (thanks to IVF), we had twins. So naturally, you’d like that was it for us but no – we have a frozen embryo that’s been on my mind for SIX years. But really I never thought we’d use it – I just couldn’t fathom getting rid of it. Then everything changed all of a sudden. Our girls are in senior kindergarten and the thought that we were done was just too much. I say follow your gut and don’t commit to anything until you reach a point where you know for sure it’s enough or it isn’t.
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